Every time we interact with our children, we create a bond of love and nit the relationship with our children, the way parents speak and the words they say to them stay with them forever and creates a lifelong impression on the child.
A growing number of parents are aware about the impacts of their words leave on the children. A large number of population of parents have understood the importance of praise and have adopted to praise and motivate their children, yet the is lot more to the technique of praising children, it is not only to say ‘Wow you did a good job!’. It is the amount of praise and the way we appreciate them makes a huge difference and brings a massive difference on how they behave and deliver the best results.
Below are outlined some of the basic and most common scenarios to praise and appreciate children and also outlining best way of communicating, that helps the little child to not only feel proud and confident about themselves but also gives them deeper understanding about their strengths and weakness.
General praise: Wow, you are excellent at maths!
Impact: The idea that creeps into the child’s mind, through general praise maybe that he/she is excellent at maths, and do not need to focus or maybe not pay further attention in maths. These kinds of open ended sentences can maybe misleading or sometimes damaging to a child’s future ability in any particular subject.
Descriptive praise: I have noticed you have been working out hard to work out the right answers, to these problems, you have greatly improved your skills in maths.
General praise: You were being really amazing today!
Impact: makes a child to be self obsessed and overstating his/her own abilities. Does not give specific information on what they did well and how to repeat the good action again.
Descriptive praise: I really liked that you shared your toys with your friends and siblings, I can see that you are getting more responsible and caring, I am so happy about it.
General praise: You are quite active, You will be winning all the competitions on the sports day!
Impact: These praises might negatively effect the moral of children, when they do not win, and make them weak and morally vulnerable in the event of failure.
Descriptive praise: On most of the practice sessions you had a good concentration, which meant you could run fast than last time, well done!
General praise: You are a superstar in the class!
Impact:These praises can excessively boost moral of the child and may also lead to behavioural issues, as for little children are not completely experienced to handle vague and bogus talks. These praises also don’t give specifics to a child on his/her areas of improvements.
Descriptive praise: You pronounced the words clearly having a constant smile on your face and facing towards the audience, you looked very excited saying your lines. I loved to watch your performance.
General Praise: You could be an excellent painter when you grow up!
Impact: Doesn’t focus on efforts and present abilities of a child.
Descriptive praise: You seem to have good knowledge about the colours and canvas, would you show me how to mix, these colours?
It is important that parents and carers are mindful of their praises and the idea they convey through their words. A descriptive praise is often more useful as it gives more understanding of the family values and rules, and gives children greater understanding of their weakness and areas of improvements. Descriptive praises are a powerful tool to help children become willing to accept failure and stand back up for a new challenge.